How to Delaminate a certificate in three easy steps

I will come to the reason for stripping our precious degrees of their protective covering later. First let me solve a mystery which even Google and Wiki couldn’t answer definitively. If you Google “ How to remove lamination from a certificate” you get a lot of information on the lamination process , some wet blankets ( can’t be done, just apply for a new certificate ) and a couple of bravehearts who suggest dipping your certificate in hot water or even better, solvent. Ads for professional certificate delaminators also pop up from Cochin to Dhaka.

But here ladies and gentlemen is the patented ( not to mention tested ),painless, totally guaranteed, five minute  method of DIY delamination.

Equipment needed – Certificate to be delaminated ( duh ! ), a sharp pair of scissors and a hair dryer

Step 1

Cut the edge of the plastic as close to the certificate as possible without cutting the paper.

Step 2

Carefully examine the cut edge and find a gap between the plastic and the paper. Enlarge the gap with your nail or a safety pin, taking care not to peel paper.

Step 3

Use the hair dryer to gently heat the cut edge and carefully peel off the plastic. I think the heat melts the adhesive and makes the process totally smooth.

Ta-dah !

1001 ways to get cheated in Delhi

So, I was driving to work today morning and realized I was driving on an empty tank. I swung into my regular petrol station which is the Indian Oil outlet on the left just after crossing the Chirag Delhi flyover ( driving from Saket to Moolchand or south to north ). I parked, handed over my debit card and asked the attender to fill 1000 Rs worth of petrol. As usual, the attender went to swipe my card while the second attender started filling the petrol. Being of a suspicious nature, I made sure the display was set at zero before he started. I sat in the car and watched the numbers climbing. The display showed 800 Rs when the first attender came back and handed me the bill to sign. My attention diverted, I turned to take the bill. Then some instinct made me look at the screen again and I saw the second attender swiftly terminate the transaction when only 848 Rs worth of petrol had been filled!

I hope you are able to appreciate the truly heinous, fiendish and diabolical nature of the crime. Even more so when you realize that this isn’t a petty crime committed by the employee but probably an regular practice instituted by the management to make money. Think of how much their profit margins must shoot up if they are able to cheat even 5% of their customers a day. The attenders are probably tipped at the end of the day based on the amount of petrol saved. Just one more instance of how deeply entrenched corruption is in our society.

What happened next ? I created a ruckus but no senior personnel were available on the premises. I left my card and number and asked the management to get in touch with me and left without signing my bill. I have googled the owner of this particular petrol station and intend to call him to lodge an official complaint. Although I am sure that the only actual action I am going to take would be to change petrol stations and to watch the metre like a hawk in future.

Update – I called up and talked to the owner, a sweet old man who rambled on & on about the sad story of his life, his ill health, his children who neglect him, his bank loans and of course his swindling employees and then started sobbing on the phone. Lesson learnt – Old age is a bitch and I am a horrible person who makes old men cry.